I have a confession to make, dear reader.

My name is Tom. I’m 25 and I live with my parents.

Every time I say that I think of the Seinfeld episode where George does everything in the opposite manner he would normally. He says that to a woman (but adds in that he’s unemployed; happily, I am not) and she replies “I’m Victoria, hi” in a sultry voice.

Mind you, I don’t often say that as an opening line with girls. Or really anything as a line. My opening line would be more along the lines of “Hi.” 

Anyway.

What I want to write about today are my own choices in life, and why I live with my parents.

Basically, up until…maybe a few months ago I didn’t really understand money. Throughout university things were taken care of for me, and after university I just moved back here because I hadn’t worked much during university and what money I had made, I spent. A lot. I have horrible spending habits and it’s only in the last few months that I’ve learned to control them. I was always waiting for my income to increase to the point that it would eventually cover my habits. But it doesn’t work that way. As my income increased, my tastes got more expensive.

My parents have been great, and through the course of my life they’ve always been there to help me out when I needed it. And really if I said to them I’d like to stay here until I’m ready to move out and get married, they’d be fine with that.

I wouldn’t be, though.

I had always said that I couldn’t afford to move out right now. I’ve had the job I’m in now for almost six months, and at the outset of it I knew the experience would be great, but it would not really be enough to move out. I had that set in my mind; I was not making enough to move out. It wasn’t until a friend pointed out to me that she moved out while making a lot less than I did that it made me start to think.

Could I do this?

So I started to look and crunch the numbers on my take home pay, rent for a half-decent place, a rough estimate of utilities and the expenses I would expect to incur every month.

I was actually more than a bit shocked to learn it was doable.

I mean I’d be living a very different life than I was living now. No more Brooks Brothers shirts, far less eating out, no more buying shows off iTunes willy-nilly (I worked out that a DVR would actually be a cheaper option, monthly). I had always said to people that I could live very comfortably, for now, with my parents, or subsist on Kraft Dinner in a roach-infested basement apartment. I was amazed to learn that, if I paid played my cards right, I’d be able to do this.

And I want to. Because I am embarrassed to live with my parents.

This is not to say anything against those of you who do. Good on you, really. It is definitely a smart financial move and would be the smartest thing for me to do right now. Save up, live comfortably, have meals cooked and laundry done and then, someday in the distance when I land that perfect job, I can move out.

But when is that? Really?

I love my parents dearly, but living in close quarters with anyone for any long period of time is tough. I lived with 5 of the best people possible in university, but at the end of those 3 years we were definitely getting on each other’s nerves. It doesn’t help that, as mentioned before, I am a massive introvert and need my space. Being here 24/7 is starting to wear on me a bit.

I’d be relying on getting a higher paying job within the next year, as just about any place would essentially be outside my range right now without eating in to savings a bit. I’d have to start putting aside rent now, when I have fewer expenses, and essentially use that when I move out to cover my rent and use my regular paycheques to cover expenses. I’d be living pretty close to paycheque to paycheque until I started making more money.

My choice now is, is it worth it? Is the independence and the feeling of being your own man worth it? I haven’t decided yet. I could also take all that money I’m saving and go for yoga teacher training in India, or do Thailand for 2 weeks and still have a ton left over. 

But that means coming home to a room and a house not my own. That means having that awkward, slightly embarrassing conversation any time I start talking to a girl where I mention I live with my parents. I’m always relieved if I find someone else who does. It’s like we share the same issue.

Of course there’s also the fact that I’m in Mississauga and that puts a huge damper on my social life.

For now, I’m planning on a move-out date in November. Gives me lots of time to save up, start buying a few of the things I need and start looking for a place.

But what do you think? Is it worth it?